Some people are lucky. They know exactly what they want to do from an early age, pursue it with confidence, and actually find fulfillment.
But for most of us, by the time we join university, we still haven’t figured it out. So we end up being pressured into careers our parents, guardians, or society believe are best for us.
We enroll in these courses, often because we don’t know any better. And then, somewhere along the way, we start to hate them. We count down to graduation, not with excitement, but with relief, so we can finally ditch the degree and chase what we truly care about.
But when that time comes, things aren’t so simple.
The pressure to follow the path that was laid out for you, by family, by expectations, by fear can be overwhelming.
You’re torn. Your parents have mapped out a future for you, but your heart wants something different. You’re confused. Anxious.
Your peers seem to be moving forward while you feel stuck, unsure, hesitant, left behind.
You wish you could figure things out, carve a path that’s yours. But no matter how hard you try, you can’t seem to find your way.
I know that feeling too well. I spent four years spinning in circles before I finally found a way out. Today, I want to share that path with you: five steps to take if you’ve graduated and are unsure whether to pursue the degree you studied for.
But before we begin, promise me one thing: keep an open mind.
What I’m about to share is not what you’d expect to hear from a career coach. It might not sound inspiring, but it’s real. And more importantly, it works. It worked for me. I’m confident it can work for you too.
Step 1: Know that there’s nothing wrong with you.
You’re not lost, cursed, or behind. You’re exactly where you’re supposed to be. You belong here.
The truth is, most people don’t know what they want to do by the time they reach adulthood. And today, it’s even harder to decide. Thanks to the internet, we have access to endless information about every possible career path. With that much choice, making one decision feels overwhelming.
In an ideal world, you’d stumble upon a passion early on, maybe through your parents or a role model. You’d get the support to explore it, develop your skills over time, and by the time you’re 20, you’d already be well on your way. That’s how it happened for people like Bill Gates, Mark Zuckerberg, and even Mike Tyson.
I’m not saying they had it easy. But they found something early, got the chance to go deep into it, and followed that thread into adulthood. That’s rare.
Most of us don’t get that kind of head start. When we’re young, we’re curious about everything; music, sports, science, art, farming, tech, you name it. And that’s normal. It’s how exploration looks.
More so, not every parent knows how to spot and nurture their child’s strengths. Many just want you to work hard, pass your exams, and get into a “good” course that leads to a “safe” job.
So if you’re unsure about the career path to take, don’t beat yourself up. That uncertainty isn’t a flaw, it’s the norm. In fact, being certain about your career path in your early 20s is the exception, not the rule.
And if you’re too worried about figuring things out remember there’s no universal timeline for success in anything. Some people figure things early, others take longer.
Take Harland Sanders, for instance, the man behind Kentucky Fried Chicken. He didn’t start franchising KFC until he was in his 60s. Or Sam Walton, who opened the first Walmart store at age 44, long after most people think your best years are behind you.
Your journey is yours. So give yourself permission to figure things out at your own pace. Don’t waste energy stressing over what you can’t control.
Step 2: Understand that you don’t have to be certain about your career path.
We’ve been taught to treat finding our career path like it’s a life-or-death mission. Society has romanticized it so much that many people end up feeling anxious or even depressed when they can’t decide.
At the heart of this pressure is one well-meaning but misleading piece of advice:
“Choose a career you’re passionate about”
Variations of this are many but the most interesting one I’ve heard is “Choose a job you’re passionate about and you’ll never have to work a single day”
It sounds inspiring, but it assumes a career is the outcome of a passion. For some, that works. But for those who didn’t develop a strong passion for something early on, it creates more stress than clarity. They’re the majority.
Instead what we should have been taught is:
“Competence creates passion”
It means, when you get good at something, you naturally become passionate about it. It doesn’t matter what it is, especially when you’re starting out.
So, instead of trying to figure out the perfect career path, focus instead on getting good at whatever you have and you’ll find it more enjoyable with time.
Personally, I spent years chasing clarity and never quite found it. Things changed when I shifted my focus to getting good at whatever I had in hand. Somehow, the prospects of meaningful career paths started emerging.
Step 3: Play the cards you’ve been dealt, and play to win.
Let’s be real: life doesn’t deal everyone the same hand.
We’re born into families of different financial and social statuses, we grow up in different parts of the world and we all have very unique challenges and experiences throughout our lives. So we don’t end up with the same cards when starting off our career lives.
Some of us have exceptional academic qualifications. Others are naturally gifted in sports or the arts. Some have well-connected parents, friends and relatives. Others will have already honed survival skills such as salesmanship, financial discipline, grit, or creativity.
Everyone will have their own set of cards. In retrospect, here were the cards I had when I graduated:
- Academic certificates with good grades
- A degree that can secure me a lucrative career
- Supportive parents who could get me a job
- Good communication and presentation skills
- Writing passion and skills
However, when launching my career path, I ignored the first 4 cards and played card number 5 alone, because I was passionate about writing and I wanted to make it as a writer.
Nowadays it’s very common for kids to spend up to 6 years in university and then upon graduation, toss aside their degrees to follow a passion. It’s even become fashionable in some circles.
But from my experience, I’d caution against discarding your advantages in the name of pursuing your passion.
Regardless of how motivated you are, putting aside advantages that give you a faster and better chance to succeed in life and playing the passion card alone is not wise. It doesn’t always end well.
I’m not saying people haven’t succeeded by following their passion. I know several who dropped out of school to become content creators, academic writers, or entrepreneurs, and they’re doing better than most salaried professionals.
However, these people had more than passion. They were obsessed. They were disciplined. They were relentless. Giving up was never an option.
Most people don’t realize how much that level of intensity takes. I didn’t either when I was starting out. I never knew what it took to succeed as a writer and I wasn’t prepared to give it my all. I thought writing for a few months would make me rich. Unfortunately it’s not that easy.
If you haven’t pulled all-nighters, poured yourself into a project for months, or made serious life sacrifices to pursue a goal, you might not be ready to rely on passion alone.
To be blunt, if you’re an average person with no plan, no savings, and no runway, don’t toss aside the advantages you do have to chase a blind passion.
If someone can secure you a real (professional traditional and salaried) job (even if it’s not what you want at the moment), take it, unless you already have a better opportunity.
And if your academic qualifications can open doors for you, don’t hesitate to walk through them.
The real world is brutal and merciless. Take advantage of opportunities that come easy or that are handed to you on a silver platter. Build from there. Then, when you’re ready, you can take bigger bets on your passion with a safety net beneath you.
Step 4: Be grateful for every opportunity and give it your best.
When starting out and unsure of your career path, every genuine opportunity you get can be a launchpad to your dream life.
It might not be your dream job. It might even feel like a detour. But it’s a chance to uncover new dimensions of yourself, to grow, and to build skills you don’t yet realize you’ll need.
Looking back, I see the opportunity I wasted. I also see those who had the same chances I did, grabbed them with both hands and completely transformed their lives.
I was too busy chasing “the perfect opportunity” to appreciate the ones already in front of me. This mindset stuck with me throughout school and into my early twenties..
If you’re stuck in that same headspace, and you’re thinking that nothing matters unless it looks exactly like your dream job, it’s time to snap out of it.
Take a moment. Look around.
What do you see?
What do you have that others only wish for?
What’s in your hand, right now, that you could use to build something?
That’s where your focus should be.
It’s okay to have your dreams at the back of your mind. But for now, ground yourself in the present and appreciate what life has handed you. Then go all in.
Show up early. Stay focused.
Solve real problems. Learn the ropes.
Network. Build relationships.
And above all, get really, really good at what you do.
This doesn’t mean you’ve given up on your dreams. It means you’ve recognized the opportunities the universe has given you, you are grateful for them and you’ll give it your best.
And guess what, I’ve learnt, happens when you do this?
- You start enjoying the job. Remember “competence creates passion”. As you get better at your job, it becomes more fulfilling. You feel useful. Confident. Respected. That energy radiates, and people notice.
- You gain unexpected, transferable skills. Think of a graduate engineer who wants to do writing, but finds themselves in a site managing construction activities. What skills does he develop? Project management, human resource management and cost management, all which he can transfer in starting a writing agency. If he learns how to handle disgruntled workers on a site, he’ll probably handle discontented freelance writers much better when building an agency. In short, the “wrong” job often ends up preparing you perfectly for the “right” one..
- You move closer to the path meant for you. When I stopped obsessing over my career and instead started taking up opportunities life was giving me, things fell in place. I had to let go in order to move forward.
Letting go and doing your best in what you have is a way of telling the universe you appreciate what it’s doing for you. And the universe rewards gratitude.
For everyone who has will be given more, and they will have an abundance; but the one who does not have, even what they have will be taken away.
So start with what you have. Show up. Be excellent. Be grateful. And watch what happens.
Step 5: Get proactive about finding your career path.
Once you stop obsessing over what your career should be and start appreciating what you already have,
Your mind opens up.
You begin to notice the possibilities around you.
You start to feel grateful.
And that gratitude creates mental clarity that helps you begin the real work of finding your path.
But finding your path has to come from within and will require effort, consistency and patience. Remember, nothing worthwhile comes easy.
Being proactive about your career means taking the wheel. Not waiting to be rescued or discovered. Not drifting wherever life takes you. But deliberately choosing the road you want to walk.
But first, let’s be real.
It’s much easier to figure out your career path when you’re not desperate to pay bills.
This is why I said earlier, if you can get a job that caters for your bills, take it first, even if it’s not what you want.
Brutal truth: If your passion can’t pay your bills anytime soon, and you’re not putting in an unhealthy amount of time or don’t have exceptional perseverance, you’ll likely give up before it bears fruit.
Another brutal truth: Not everyone will discover their passion, let alone turn it into something meaningful or financially sustainable.
What makes the journey easier is having financial stability. A steady income gives you the freedom and clarity to explore what truly matters to you.
For most of us, financial security comes first. Doing something you’re not passionate about but getting paid well can often give you the mental space and resources to later do what you are passionate about.
I’m more mentally stable today, thanks to a job that pays and allows me to save, even though it’s not 100% aligned with my passion.
Now, how do you become proactive?
1. Identify things you’re naturally good at.
Every job involves a range of skills, and you won’t be equally good at all of them. But there are certain tasks that come easier to you than to others. Identify those strengths, and focus on using them to your advantage.
Notice which tasks energize you. What do people frequently compliment you on? Listen to what your colleagues and mentors say about your work. Sometimes, others see your strengths more clearly than you do.
Also pay attention to topics you can talk endlessly about without any prep. If you’re a restaurant waiter but find yourself passionately discussing investing with customers and coworkers, finance might be your true calling.
2. Stand out by showcasing your strengths.
This goes back to “playing the cards you’ve been dealt with to win”. You don’t need permission to showcase your talents as long as they don’t interfere with your core responsibilities.
One of my mentors told me “The career world is brutal. If you don’t get noticed, you’ll live to feed on crumbs.” The best way to get noticed? Do more of what you’re best at.
The more you stand out, the more people think about you when they have or come across opportunities.
3. Network like your life depends on it.
The job market runs on connections. It works in your favor if you know the right people, and against you if you don’t. Like it or not, that’s the reality. Either learn to play the game, or waste your energy trying to fight a system that’s unlikely to change.
Your biggest asset when building a career is your network. If you know the right people, your progress can get up to 100 times faster than if you try figuring things out on your own.
Your colleagues will share with you opportunities they think you’ll fit in. Your bosses will recommend you. Some will have friends in fields you want to venture in and they might help you get in. Others will link you with people who will open doors for you.
Networking isn’t just about exchanging contacts; it’s about staying top of mind when doors open. So make it a habit. Build genuine relationships. Be helpful. Stay curious.
When you develop a clear sense of what you’re good at, consistently showcase your strengths, and build genuine connections with others, opportunities begin to find you. You naturally gravitate toward meaningful work, not through force, but through flow.
One day, you’ll look around, maybe seated in an office or working on a project you love, and realize you’ve arrived at the kind of role you once couldn’t have even imagined.
And it won’t be because you meticulously planned every step or forced the puzzle pieces into place. It’ll be because you stayed grateful, embraced each opportunity, and gave it your absolute best.
That’s the quiet, powerful path to your destiny; no stress, just steady, intentional growth.