There are so many things I have aspired to be since I was young. It’s a good thing to believe you have the potential to be anything. But the detriment is that you never seem to have a stand on who you really want to be. Without clear direction, you’re headed nowhere. So this brain dump is me basically realigning my heart. What do I truly value right now? If I had a short while to live, how would I lead the rest of my life?
First of all, I will set up my life to read and write more. I would read so I can write. I would write so I can leave a piece of myself in the world. I think I write well, and I’ve had scenarios play out in my life that confirm my writing can be very impactful. So I want to assume it’s the single most powerful tool I can use to create impact in this world. I would most definitely want to lead the few final days of my life doing the one thing I know has the most impact. But I’ll also be scared that my writing won’t reach many people, and that would crush my soul in the afterlife. Imagine dedicating your last days to something that barely moves the needle. But anyways, I have no control over the outcomes of my actions.
Another thing I would do is have more fun with life. I would find a way to buy a car, most likely through a loan, learn to drive for a week, then pack up my shit and take my girlfriend on a road trip around Kenya. I will visit places such as Maasai Mara, Amboseli, Tsavo, Malindi, Lamu, Mt. Elgon, Namanga, Nyahururu, Isabania, Busia, and many more. I would document my travels, probably showing the world what I loved most about each of these places. I’d play music throughout the road trip. I would talk a lot, laugh a lot, and have as much fun as a human can take. My mission, again, would be to tell my story — the story of a guy who said fuck-it to societal pressures and chose instead to make the little slice of life he was given worthwhile.
Lastly, I would take time every day to call and talk to my parents, siblings, close relatives, and friends. My mission would simply be making small talk and sharing pleasantries. I’d gossip like mama mboga and make fun of life. Because deep down, I’d know my time is short.
My deduction from this braindump is that I need to
- Read more
- Create time to write more
- Buy a car
- Travel more
- Talk more with my people.